When trying to do everything right starts to feel exhausting

You may be someone who holds yourself to high standards and takes responsibility seriously. You notice what others need quickly, maybe even before they’re aware of it. You might be an overachiever- someone who is reliable, productive, and praised for your work ethic. On the outside, you’re confident and capable. Inside though, much of your energy goes toward managing expectations, leaving you feeling tense, self-critical, and quietly depleted.

Perfectionism and people pleasing often show up across both work and relationships. You may say yes to more than you can handle at work, get stuck doing other people’s jobs for them, or feel like you’re falling behind unless you’re performing at a high level. In relationships, you might find yourself over-accommodating, monitoring yourself to see how you’re coming across, or choosing harmony over honesty. Even when things are going well, it’s hard to feel satisfied in a friendship or relationship where you’re not fully present. You may have a sense that you’re achieving or adapting your way into a life centered on others with no place for you.

These patterns didn’t come out of nowhere

I don’t see perfectionism, people pleasing, or overachieving as flaws to eliminate. More often, they’re meaningful adaptations- ways you learned how to stay safe, connected, or valued earlier in life. Excelling, being agreeable, and staying ahead of expectations may have been the way you secured approval, stability, or belonging.

Over time, these strategies become exhausting. That’s probably why you’re here. What once helped you feel valued and productive now contributes to a cycle of stress, resentment, burnout, and a growing distance from your own needs. You may understand this intellectually and still feel stuck in the pattern of striving, performing, and over-functioning even when it’s no longer sustainable.

How this work unfolds

Rather than trying to change these patterns directly, our work begins by slowing down and getting curious about how they operate, especially in the places where pressure shows up most strongly like work, family dynamics, and achievement. We pay close attention to the times when your inner critic comes out, what happens in your body when you feel like it’s all on you, and how these responses make sense in the context of your history and relationships.

As the connections between past and present become clearer, many people notice a subtle shift. The inner critic softens. Work feels less consuming. You feel like you can say no to taking on extra tasks. Relationships feel less performative. There’s more room to notice what you want or need too. This change isn’t forced, it emerges as you develop a more trusting, compassionate relationship with your own inner experience.

This work may be a good fit if:

• You feel driven by internal pressure, even when you’re outwardly successful

• You tend to overachieve at work and struggle to rest or feel a sense of enough

• You adapt quickly to others in relationships and minimize your own needs

• You’re tired of striving, second guessing, and impossible internal standards

• You want to understand why these patterns developed, not just how to manage them

A gentle invitation

If perfectionism, people pleasing, or overachieving feel familiar, therapy can offer space to explore those patterns with care rather than judgment. You don’t need to know exactly what you want to change or where things will lead.

A consultation is simply a chance to meet, talk a bit about what’s brought you here, and see whether this way of working feels like a good fit