Trauma Therapy
Online EMDR and trauma-informed therapy for anxiety and grief based in Aptos and serving all of California
Does it feel like your mind and body are stuck in survival mode?
Maybe your anxiety feels constant and exhausting. Your mind races, your body tenses, and even small stresses can start to feel overwhelming. You know it's more than just typical anxiety because of the memories that come up from your past.
Or maybe grief has changed the way you go through life. Since the loss, you feel emotionally raw, disconnected, numb, or like things no longer feel the same. Part of you may wonder if you’ll ever feel grounded or fully yourself again.
Sometimes these experiences are connected to a clearly traumatic event: a sudden loss, illness, accident, betrayal, or threat to your safety. Other times they develop slowly through years of emotional unpredictability, chronic stress, or relationships where you never felt safe, understood, or emotionally secure.
When your nervous system has spent a long time trying to protect you, rest and safety can start to feel like danger.
It’s a lot of work to keep yourself functioning. Over time, that effort starts to feel draining. You’re not just tired of holding onto what happened, you’re tired of how much it still affects you now.
Your body holds constant tension that’s physically painful- muscles that can’t relax, digestive issues, or difficulty sleeping
Being emotionally open in relationships feels difficult even when you want it, so your relationships feel shallow and distant and you feel lonely even with others
You spend a lot of time and effort trying to control yourself, your situation, or other people so you can feel okay or prevent something painful from happening again
Moments of stress and conflict feel intense and threatening, so you either shut down, avoid it, or respond in ways you don’t want to
When you’re overwhelmed you dissociate- you check out, go numb, or lose time and it’s hard to stay fully present or do the things you want to do
Grief comes in waves that feel overwhelming and unpredictable, and part of you worries that moving forward means losing your connection to the person you lost
These reactions can feel unpredictable and intense, and you’re left trying to recover once the moment passes. Trauma keeps your nervous system focused on survival, and that doesn’t leave you much left over for living the life you want.
Trauma requires holistic healing- mind, body, and spirit.
Trauma therapy isn’t about forcing yourself to relive painful experiences. It’s about helping your mind and body process memories that were never fully resolved. My approach is both relational and trauma-informed. We move at a pace that feels manageable, building the capacity to explore difficult memories related to your grief or anxiety without you feeling overwhelmed by them.
I’m trained in several trauma therapy methods including:
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Somatic and Attachment Focused Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing is a way of approaching traumatic memories through your body memory. We’ll start with a current issue like anxiety, grief reactions, emotional triggers, or relationship patterns, and trace those experiences back to the earliest times you’ve felt the same way. Starting from early childhood, we’ll work through these memories that are still affecting you so they no longer carry the same intensity they do now.
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Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) and Interpersonal Neurobiology (IPNB) are the primary approaches I use in talk therapy. Both approaches focus on your present experience, helping us work through the past by understanding how it still affects your emotions, relationships, and nervous system today. ACT focuses on helping you respond to difficult thoughts and emotions in a way that keeps you connected to your values and the life you want to live. IPNB focuses on how healing relationships create safety, emotional regulation, and new relational experiences that help repair the impact of past wounds and loss.
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Written Exposure Therapy (WET) is a narrative approach where you spend much of the session writing about difficult experiences using a structured series of prompts. This process can help reduce the emotional intensity of painful memories while allowing you to explore grief, trauma, and overwhelming experiences at your own pace. This approach can feel especially supportive for people who struggle to talk out loud about what happened but feel more comfortable expressing themselves through writing.
These methods allow us to work directly with trauma memories and the body’s stress response so that your past memories no longer have the same emotional intensity anymore.
In our work together we may:
identify and work through emotional patterns, automatic reactions, painful memories or body feelings that feel stuck or unresolved
process trauma with EMDR or other approaches so memories, grief, and emotional triggers no longer feel as overwhelming or consuming
notice how trauma shows up in your body, emotions, and relationships so we can explore what’s underneath those pain points
build up a strong sense of internal safety and stability so you can stay grounded and present even when difficult things come up
When you’ve experienced trauma or overwhelming loss, it makes sense that you feel safer when you’re more in control of things. Trying to manage your reactions, your environment, or other people can feel like the only way to stay okay.
The problem is that control gives you a feeling of short-term relief without creating true safety.
Trying to manage everything is exhausting, and it doesn’t actually create the deeper sense of safety you’re actually looking for. My approach focuses on something different. We’ll work toward building a sense of internal safety and trust in yourself, so even when things feel uncertain or intense, you can stay grounded and respond in a way that feels authentic to your values.
This doesn’t mean forcing yourself to feel okay, ignoring signs of actual danger, or getting rid of difficult thoughts and emotions. Many reactions like intrusive thoughts, strong emotions, shutting down, or going numb are automatic. They’re not something you can simply control or turn off.
What we focus on instead is what happens next: how you relate to those experiences, how you talk to yourself in the moment and afterwards, and how you choose to respond. This is also where boundaries become important. Part of feeling safe isn’t controlling everything, it’s knowing that if something is unsafe you’ll recognize it and respond in a way that protects you.
When you don’t feel like you have to brace for danger or control every outcome anymore, you gain more flexibility in how you respond to life. You’re able to stay more present, connected, and emotionally open even in the face of uncertainty, grief, conflict, or life’s stresses.
Trauma therapy can help you change the way you relate to your past and present so you can:
Respond to stress, uncertainty, and emotional triggers in a way that feels more in proportion to what’s currently happening
Stay present even during difficult conversations, moments of grief, or periods of anxiety instead of shutting down or becoming overwhelmed
Feel an internal sense of safety, even when things feel out of control
Relax, rest, and sleep in peace without nightmares, panic, or intrusive thoughts
Feel safer being emotionally close, vulnerable, and connected in relationships
Pause and choose how to respond in a way that feels aligned with your values instead of reacting automatically from fear, overwhelm, or survival mode
Your past won’t feel like it’s running your life anymore. You’ll have more space, flexibility, and trust in yourself to move through life with greater presence, connection, and emotional freedom.
Let’s help you move from survival mode into a fuller, more connected life
I offer online trauma therapy and EMDR therapy for people in Aptos and throughout California.
Frequently asked questions about therapy for trauma
Do you use EMDR for trauma?
Yes, I am trained in Somatic and Attachment Focused EMDR which is a gentler, more holistic way to approach EMDR that is particularly helpful for people whose trauma developed through ongoing or relational experiences.
Can therapy help with panic attacks?
Yes. Therapy can help you understand the internal and physical processes that fuel panic and develop a calmer response when symptoms arise. Panic attacks can happen after trauma, but they do not have to define your future.
Is online therapy effective for trauma?
Yes. In fact, many of my clients say they enjoy online therapy during trauma work because they are able to be home or in another safe place instead of out in an unfamiliar office. If you want to do EMDR, there may be some tech requirements to make sure you are able to fully participate. We can discuss those tech requirements and any possible adjustments during your free consultation.